Saturday, August 22, 2009

Goodbye "Gin"

After battling for her life
in recent months
"Gin" has gone home
to be with the Lord
She passed
peacefully
at home
Gin or as I called her Grandma W
was one of the sweetest women
I have ever met
with her small voice
and big opinions
she lived a long
and happy simple life
even when life was not always happy
"Gin" always showed her contentment with her life
always had a smile to share
in recent years..
age and illness had taken it's toll..

in the heart and soul of the family
everyone knew she was ready to go home

her husband of like forever
"Rocky" was there by her side
fighting to keep her here with us
showing us all
the stuff our Rocky is made of
even if his thinking and reactions
are one of a confused older man..
set in his ways
his beliefs are from another time
and place
while the world has changed
Rocky and Gin always just stayed
"Rocky and Gin"
the family
are all going to miss her greatly
so are her many many friends
she has made over the years.

Virginia Lee Weirauch
August 20, 2009

Friday, August 14, 2009

tears and laughter

where do I start
tears ...
my soul cries
for the person
you are
and
can be
not the little girl
you used to be
I know she is gone
my heart
aches to help the young women
you are
the soul
at battle within ..
I will be here
without judgement
just love
just with the purest of hope's
just with the purest of intentions.

somewhere along the journey
of you and me
you got the idea
that the only way
I could be happy with us
is if you lived here
but the truth in my heart
is I want you to be happy
I want you to feel balanced
I want you too be whole
I want you to dance in the spirit of yourself
I want you to be proud of you
I want you too love yourself
I want you to explore
what life has to offer you
I want you to have faith
faith in yourself
I want you to not have fear
fear that holds you back from being
all you can be in this life ..
I want your laughter
to out weigh your tears
I want you to have faith
faith in yourself
these things would make me happy
when it comes to you and me
where you live,
what you choose
the way you live you life
is all up to you
it always has been
even as a little girl
was always yours
regardless of the circumstances
my heart
my door
my life
has always been open to you
and it always will be
because
I love you
unconditionally
and I always will

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

letting go ..

It was rainy weekend
so I tackled grandpa's old room
tubs of things that where my grand mothers
still stored in the closet
I still had her purse just
as she left it
it's taken 3 years to be able to go through it all
and be able to throw things out
other things I donated to salvation army
All the paper work
from several years
I was able to shred and get rid of
the rest of grandpa's things
things he can't use anymore
need anymore
I finally got rid of
it took me most the weekend
but I got it all done
there was a few things
I just couldn't part with
I don't know if I ever will
I kept her robe
and the purple teddy bear
that laid on her lap her final days
the one that I gave her years before
the bible she read from
the one that I read from to her in her final days
along with some of my own past
stored in boxes
I was finally able to let most of it go
in the back of the closet I found a sealed box
I knew what it was
it was part of my past
a part I don't believe I will ever
be ready to let go
I have not looked in the box in years
but I know it's there
just as those memories
are always there
in the back of my mind
the box will remain in the back of the closet
I don't need the items to remember
believe me
I remember
so why do I keep them
I really don't know
I just know
I can't let them go
just like the few things I kept of grams
I just can't let them go
a few times going through
the things
I found myself in tears
it was not easy
to go through all these things
to let go of so many things
but it was time
but the few things
I couldn't part with
it's silly
they are all placed in a closet
one I don't go through very often
why can't I just let them all go
they are just things
I will always hold the memories
I don't need things to revisit the past
I just need close my eyes
but I just can't seem to let go