Friday, January 15, 2010

Tonights Gathering

a small group of strangers gathered tonight
with candles and prayers and heavy hearts
each knowing that prayer at this point
is all we can really do
Yes we can all give to a charity
and we should ..if we can
But that does not seem like enough
So we gathered together
there is something special
about praying with others
the energy that is shared
it fills your spirit with hope
hope that our prayers will help
hope that our prayers give hope
to those in need
to those who have been lost ..

I know when things happen,in my life
knowing people are praying for me
always gives me hope
gives me strength
to carry on ..face what ever it is I need to face

As we spoke tonight
getting to know each others
prayers for the people of Haiti
it didn't feel like we where among strangers
the energy in the group was in harmony
all compassionate souls ..

In different places in life
different beliefs
but none of that mattered
it was the joining together
with hopeful and caring hearts
that mattered
when we parted ways
I hope each felt as I did
that strangers have now become friends in our Lord

God Bless those in need of God's Blessings tonight
everywhere ..

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Happy ever after?

I have never believed in happy ever after
maybe cause I grew up
with parents who where not very happy together
and sometimes abusive with each other
yet they now have been married 50 years
unless you count those few years they divorced
then remarried lol
My Nana who lived with us
on the other hand had a wonderful marriage
she and my grandfather where true soul mates
she would tell me so
but sadly he died suddenly of a heart attack when I was 3
and I watched her miss him every day
she would talk about him and them all the time
she missed him every day till she died
showing me that Happy does not last forever
one way or another happy always ends
so no I don't believe in happy ever after
what I believe is
that we have many levels of soul connections
there is not just one person
that will complete the picture in our minds of "happiness"
that even the bad relationship we have ..
they have purpose
even those had happy moments
but like all happy moments they end ..
cause nothing ends "happy" does it?
I believe in contentment
loving someone enough
to go through all the bullshit
life throws at them
and sticking it out
not because you have too
but because you just can't let the other go
even though at times they can make you so mad
so crazy ..you just want to kill them lol
and sometimes you think..
Yes!!!... killing them would make me happy lol
I believe that it's sometimes harder to stay together
then break it off
many..many times over the span of a marriage
but when all happiness is gone
it's very hard to let it go ..I know this ..did this ..
You are always hoping and praying happiness returns
even a glimmer of what once was
and when it's gone
it's gone
Personally I don't even want to label
my relationship a marriage
I don't know exactly why but
it's my relationship
yes I am married
I have a piece of paper that says I am
had that piece of paper now almost 13 years
but in a moment of unhappiness
I could burn that piece of paper
and I could leave and not look back
But I can't ...
why?
because
I would miss him
my heart would hurt..
just to see him
talk to him
kiss him
be with him
laugh with him
fight with him
lean on him
hate him
all those emotions
is to me what "happiness" really is
it's living
it's what matters
not the car we drive
not how much money we make
not the house in which we live
it's the life between us
it's the laughter
and the fights
the bond
the love
the strength
the fight over the remote
that's what happiness is to me
will it last forever?
nope
cause nothing lasts forever
and nothing ever ends Happy


response to: Linda Lou Blog
http://vegaslindalou.blogspot.com/2010/01/damn-you-susan-sarandon-and-tim-robbins.html

Sunday, January 3, 2010

2010 my thoughts

so you thought
this new year
would bring on all these
changes
your holidays are over
you probably feel
a bit let down
that it's now over
and you now face a budget
that is crunched
welcome to 2010
Maybe you let yourself
believe ..
maybe hope is a better word
that 2010 would bring on everything positive
well for the most of us
2010 has already started to challenge our "hope"
those big hopes we had
seem to be diminishing
and it's only the 3rd day in to 2010 lol
We need to remind ourselves
that when we find ourselves in darkness
always comes a light to show us the way
we have to make choices
we have to take chances
and we have to have faith in each other
even when having faith in that person
shakes your since of security
or your since of normalcy
sometimes you have to give up a bit of comfort
a bit of your thought of what's right
and let that person and You know who it is
let that person lead
have faith in that person
You have to give up a little control
share with that person
and give the rest to God
you have to Pray
you have to stay in the positive
you have to have hope
hope in that this change within you will let
someone else grow too
you have wanted to direct things
take control
but you can't control this time
this phase
this New Year
You will need to lean on each other
You will need to find middle ground
and be tolerant of another's lead
it's scary
and your not sure you know how to let go ..
even a little bit
but You know you need too
You know that growth is needed
within both of you
so now the time
the challenges you will face
will be scary at times
you will feel hopeless
but you will lean on each other
find hope in the others growth
you may even find the friend you thought was gone
or one that you never really had before
are you ready ?
ready to hand over some of your control?
time to get ready
it will make the first phase of 2010 a whole lot better if you do..